Youth Lament

I am learning I just need a job where I work no more than four days a week.  And that's why subbing was perfect for me.  I could take a day off if I wanted. If for example I was tired, or it wasn't light out when my alarm went off (like everyday this week)  - I had no accountability.

Now I have accountability.

Now I can't study Korean while a boring movie I just watched for the last six periods is playing in the background.

Now I can't do craft projects during my free periods - because I have zero free periods.

Still from a stop motion movie I'll probably never finish because I am an adult with a full time job.

Hmmm.  So this means all the fun things that make my little life interesting actually have to be done at home, where I am just too tired to do them.  Which means they don't get done.  Instead I just sit online and read craft blogs and get ideas for projects I'll never have the energy or gumption to start.  Then I get stressed out about how fast my life is passing by and how I never get to do things I plan on doing.  Then I go into quarter life crisis panic mode, moan with frustration, throw things, cry and complain about being an adult.

In general, pretty much.

Jack is lazy and has no accountability. 
He is also spoiled. 
Why can't I be a cat?

Here is a picture of Jack being lazy.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy my job as a teacher aide (waiting tables doesn't hold a candle to it of course) and I enjoy helping my kids, AND my position gives me a greater sense of purpose and fills me with feelings of self worth... but I really just want some time to start a project I'll never finish.